Break and Mend
by myeclareheartwilllast
Summary: Clare finds out something Eli is hiding.


Clare's POV

I had just finished changing for PE class and was putting my things away in my gym locker when the guy's change room door flung open. I looked over to see who was coming out when I got the biggest shock of my life. It was Eli. Butt naked. With wet hair.

"Eli?" I asked with my mouth wide open in shock, "What the hell are you doing?"

I could hear the other people around me laughing and was upset they all got to see him naked for the first time the same time I did.

"OH heeeeeey Clare," Eli sputtered out before walking right past me and began opening the doors to the gym.

I was so confused I could barely even think or even attempt to understand the situation. He flung open the doors with his towel above his head like a cape. Right then, I saw Mr. Simpson walk into the gym and straight up to Eli.

"Eli, what in god's name are you doing?" He asked. Eli just took a huge step forward and said,

"Mr. Simpson..." stepping forward.. and hugging him?

"Are you on something?" the principle asked with much authority in his voice, pushing Eli away.

"Am I not on something?" Eli asked him with glazed over eyes. I realized then what I was trying to tell myself was not really happening. Eli was doing drugs.. and not just weed. Ever since he got his letter declining his acceptance to NYU he was acting weird. Avoiding my calls, skipping school. When he first got the letter he called me over and told me. I remember exactly how hurt he was.

"I didn't get in," he said to me with such defeat in his voice. Instead of speaking I just gave him a look of sympathy and took his face in my hands and looked him in the eyes. I slowly leaned in and gave him the gentlest kiss I have ever given in my life.

"They are missing out on the chance to work with the most amazing person I know," I whispered as I pulled away and pushed him to lay down on his bed and crawled in next to him, wrapping my arms tightly around his waist." I love you," I said and kissed the back of his neck.

"Go put some freaking clothes on and leave the school grounds" Mr. Simpson said and left the gym. Eli just started laughing and finally pulled the towel down and wrapped it around his waist. Thank god. He walked back into the change room and I decided I wasn't going to talk to him until later when he wasn't high.

...

Later that night I was in my room thinking about what had happened earlier. I was so angry with him for choosing this and doing this to himself instead of just talking to me and letting me bring him comfort. Not drugs. I also couldn't help picturing his cute butt. I quickly snapped myself out of it and decided what I had to do and ran downstairs. I put my shoes and coat on and started the walk to Eli's. When I got there I saw no cars in the driveway and decided to just let myself in. I walked up the stairs to his room and knocked on the door, when I heard no answer I opened it. Eli was sitting on his bed with his knees up and head in his hands. He looked up,

"Clare.." He started.

"No," I said cutting him off, " I said I was all in but I did not mean like this." The tears started pouring down my face. "Eli, I love you more than anything, you know that...but I can't do this." My voice broke at the end of my sentence letting him know how hard this is for me.

The look on his face after I said that probably caused me the most pain I have ever experienced in my life. His mouth opened in shock and his eyes immediately began to water. He looked broken. Shattered. I couldn't take it any longer standing there, staring at him, so I left. I walked right out of his room, down the stairs and out his front door. I broke then, too. I began sobbing and walking as fast as I could back to my house. I ran up the stairs and straight to my bed and cried for longer than I can even remember. After what seemed like hours, I heard my door swing open and when I looked up I saw something I wasn't expecting. Eli.

"I'll stop," He said. He immediately stepped forward grabbed my face and pulled me to his lips. This kiss was nothing like the one I gave him to comfort him. It was raw and powerful and overwhelming in the best ways possible.

"I can't lose you Clare," He said expressing something I've heard him say before as he pulled his lips away." I swear I'll stop, I'll be whoever you want me to be and do whatever you want. Just... just please don't leave me."

I was about to answer him when I felt him crash his lips over mine again, this time though he grabbed my hips and pushed me against the wall, grinding his hips into mine. I let out and incredibly loud and embarrassing moan and felt him grab onto me even harder.

"Eli," I said pushing him away so I could tell him something I always needed to remind him of." I just want you to be you, let me love you and let ME bring you comfort when you're upset."

"God I love you," he groaned out before moving us to the bed and laying next to me.

"Just stay with me forever," he said.

"No," I answered. He rolled over onto his side and looked at me with terrified eyes. "Forever and always," I whispered with a smirk on my face which he immediately responded to and crashed his lips over mine once more.


End file.
